You're the only person with a favorite bar in Disneyworld
puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
there were more penises there than on chat roulette
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
I demand visitation hours with the duck.
There's a warrant out for his arrest for throwing a mannequin through a bus stop.
We got kicked out of the ice rink last night for drinking and checking strangers... but they let us keep the beer
I am convinced that after two dates and a few adult sleepovers that he still doesn't know my name.
You insisted on going outside so you could "breathe real air".
You were buying shots for everyone, saying, "I got a tax refund. I'm a MILLIONAIRE."
It's not vacation until I get called "disgustinly sexy" by an fat woman whose older than my mother.
You're even getting laid in my dreams, god I'm a good wingman
WAIT this kid is eating yogurt with a fucking ladle. what is happening?
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