I'm at breakfast still drunk holding a blow up parrot
:( I miss blowjobs.
This is probably the strangest conversational segue we've ever had.
but why does your life always sound like the plot of a porn?
Our local strip club now has karaoke. Do you realize what this could mean for my sex life?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His bookmark is a piece of toilet paper. No shame there.
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
The chlamydia really affected his face.
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
That's what tomorrow is for. It's like bloodletting. Except with shame and liquor.
I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
drunk me cartwheeled over a turtle sandbox & slit my foot open on a cinder block. how do you explain that to a doctor?
Does it get any better than dating a guy with a vasectomy? The answer is NO. No it does not
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