the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
so she proceeds to puke everywhere, look up at me like a sick dog, and then say, "i'll finish if you want me to."
i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace
imagine playing with puppies while we're drunk.
Like... we could film it and put like, "do you believe in magic" as the backround song and it would be complete joy.
you just kept swimming in circles and whenever someone would try and coax you out you would scream "i CANNOT drown, my brother is the supervisor of a water park!!
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
You just kept saying "they don't make cigarettes for squirrels. Yet."
Just found a pic on my phone of you on squatting on the hood of a police car about to take a dump. Care to explain what happened last night?
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
Man, I want to make his penis a sandwich.
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me
You fist bumped my dick last night saying good game. That you'll be back for the 2nd game...
Is it acceptable to respond to a declaration of love with 'and I love your dick'? Asking for a friend who shares a name and possibly a phone number with me. Entirely coincidental.
Randomize
