he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
walked into a party last night, i saw 3 ex gfs standing in a circle talking to each other...that's the quickest u-turn i've ever made in my life.
Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
do you know how scary it is to wake up in a CATSCAN machine after a night of drinking?
and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
I just gave some chick my debit card to put in the jukebox. She better put out.
I've grown up since last year. I don't give blow jobs as birthday presents anymore.
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
You asked me if you had to go downstairs to get upstairs. And then you forgot where you were.
Well despite the fact that I'm still not entirely sure this isn't an elaborate/cunning plan to kill me, I'm in.
She was hiding under the bed to surprise me with sex. But when you took your hookup in my room to bang things out, she thought I was cheating on her. So explain it to her douche.
Lets just make a point system, like if we have sex add a point, if they leave after take away a point, if they stay all fucking day take away a point
I just need like a magic vacuum to suck everything out of me and then an IV to put good stuff back in
If I was a guy I'd keep a condom in my pocket, in my wallet, in my backpack, in my car, in my shoe, behind my fucking ear
Randomize
