Why does my right nut always hang lower than my left nut?
watching my parents drink 4 loko out of usf cups playing pool and rocking out to ACDC...
Can I come live with you?
Too long to explain. Basically I started an electircal fire. No one was hurt except for a box of cereal near the outlet.
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
Last I remember we played rock paper scissors for who would fuck the guy with cowboy boots on and I won..
Please don't mistake my med student status for responsibility. I'm drinking tequila while studying vascular surgery techniques.
I'm to the point where I'm fantasizing about Iron Chefs going down on me.
You haven't lived until you've thrown up naked in a hotel room in Fargo while holding your breasts so they don't touch the toilet bowl.
She picked me up from the bar in her underwear.
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
Tequilla is a sneaky bitch ninja that doesn't kick in until you least expect it. Then BAM! You're peeing in unconventional places.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
Did you throw up out the back door and cover it with paper towels?
I don't know if I'm more disturbed by the fact that you hooked up with a dude with one arm, or that "hook up with a dude with one arm" was on your bucket list.
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
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