you made me watch la bamba, and then you yelled at me for disrespecting your mexican heritage.
is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
If we went to a costume party as Batman and Robin I would go as Robin, that's how much you mean to me
we found you outside the hotel room sleeping with a note next to you that said " we made sure you were comfortable, hope your friends come back soon"
Theres a picture of you standing next to a John Wayne cardboard cutout that says dont drink and drive. your buddy is shirtless holding a beer and youre holding your keys up with marker on your face.
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
the cashier ate half of our fries before she gave them to us so i think it's safe to say they don't do drug testing there
What made this night legendary was getting pulled over for looking suspicious while wearing an iron man mask
You better be making out with him cause we're sitting here with this awkward british girl watching videos of goats singing maroon five
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
I thought he was foreign, but it turns out when you're that drunk, an Ohio accent just sounds Russian.
I or someone else dumped a lot of glitter into my boobs last night.
You took the glass microwave plate and said it was the closest thing to a frisbee, let me know how that works out for you
I farted in the parking garage and it echoed.
Don’t eat the Doritos. Jeff was eating them while he was watching porn
Randomize
