we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
I just threw up during my phone interview for the largest PR firm in the world.
But on the up side she uprooted a whole peony plant from the hotel downtown and said, "I brought you flowers"
That's cause you yelled across the parking lot you wanted to eat her out
Bro I can't jerk it to my phone anymore. I feel Siri staring back, and she's real disappointed.
we can't get the sharpie off the toilet seat from where you pressed your forearm with THUG LIFE written on it while you puked until 3 last night
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
one of my coworkers wanted to look something up on YouTube on my tablet. I didn't know how to explain why my most recent search was "girl fucks dog."
If I am telling you about the details of the shits I take I probably don't want to have sex with you. Probably.
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
Southwest doesn't have zingzang bloody Mary mix. I'm gonna file a complaint with the FAA
Randomize
