well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
I never Thought the day id see a chick shove a 2liter up her vag. that happened last night
The sweet smell of jungle juice and bad decisions is calling our name.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If you ever get the opportunity, make fun of how small his dick is for me
I got stood up on a date. They are singing "dancing with myself" on karaoke in my honor.
we somehow managed to fit a llama, a stripper pole and a hayride all into the same day.
I deserve to be covered in dicks
First date was awkward. I think I just saw someone die.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
I officially have worse injuries from a baby shower than roller derby.
well, you know. whores of a feather.
Like I didn't gracefully walk into these feelings. No, I fucking stumbled and fell face fucking first.
Drug test isn't today. Now I'm just sitting in this orientation with a bag of your piss in my pants
This is an alert from the drunk police: you have reached the point of no return. Text messages past this point are illegible.
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