I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
I just got a drinking merit badge from a slutty girl scout
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
It feels like I've shaved away my winter coat and my vagina is going to freeze if I go outside.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I walked out of the store holding my face and a lady pulled her daughter away from me as I then threwup in the parking lot
Just for future questioning, I didnt break up with you over text
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
I'm two sheets to the sexual wind
You work today? I woke up with a raging boner that was whispering your name
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got into the shower with my underwear on. I just sat down in the tub and tried to figure out when I lost all control of this hangover.
I'm sorry for aggressively singing the Frasier theme song at you so many times last night.
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell
I am listening to my ipod while i puke, this is most entertaining hangover i have ever had.
If you wanna fuck the pudding, fuck the pudding. Just not the chocolate, Im gonna eat that.
I'm not sure what happened. There's a frozen waffle in the floor and he's walking around with a curtain rod and making planes out of bread slices...
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