Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
No one showed up yet so I smoked 4:20 on chatroulette with a naked chick..
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
WHAT IF you could get pizza delivered to you IN YOUR CAR while driving somewhere. Like moving roadside service.
You're High aren't you?
Sooooo high
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
Dude. Cvs sells sex toys. And my discount works on them. Game on.
Remind me to tell you how I've been deaf since Sunday at 1245
Are you going to eat tacos off the floor again?
I panicked i brought burritos. Funeral burritos
earned some solid air miles from the plan B I just bought. #silverlinings
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
It's 1am and I'm on LSD and I have diarrhea in a Dunkin Donuts. Help me
This hangover is too legit right now. I just sneezed and almost puked
The last thing I remember before blacking out was passing that sobriety test.
I may have just got motorboated by a male stripper who told me I should be a porn star and not a vet student.
Randomize
