just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
Tell your sister I'm no fool. Or at least romanticize the notion of the fool.
that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
How does, "Im sorry I was such an intoxicated bitch, I didn't mean anything I said" sound as an apology.
i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
the whole story woulnd't be so depressing if i had made out with ANYONE but the piano player.
She set fire to my carpet trying to power-dry puke covered cigs with Josh's blowtorch. How she found it in the garage is beyond me but if you bring her with you again I'll shoot you myself.
He wanted to feed hamburgers to the homeless... as a first date... who the fuck is this kid
The realization of how permanent those tattoos really were set in this morning... I am SO sorry.
I thought turtle was a code word for weed until he pulled out a baby turtle from his pocket and said "$20 for a turtle"
No just a slight sexual miscommunication which led to a little (lot) vomiting by one party and a bruised sternum on the other party involved.
I can't even make a guess how that goes.
Seeing your boyfriend, side piece, and great white buffalo, all in one night? Its a sign right?
Proceed with caution.
I can see the future and your future is full of penis
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