every time I hook up with him I think about the fact that penicillin was a mistake too... and look how well that turned out. It makes me feel just a little bit better.
New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
You know how i spent all of black friday on the plane? Well guess who's getting a x-mas gift from skymall?!!??
regular news: took many shots of tequila.....bad news: woke up with a toothbrush and vagisil next to me.....good news: clean as a whistle
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
Just did a drug deal on the toy aisle at walmart, Merry Christmas
HOLY FUCK COMFIEST CHAIR EVER
my poor anus
I just found a To Do list on the table, written by me last night, that just says "1. Go downstairs. 2. Get Pickles. 3. Laptop"
i swear to god it was like we were fucking in 9 dimensions
The sun is out, the birds are chirping, I made some brownies, I'm not pregnant
This is literally what my 13-year old cousin said to me this morning.
He told me that after two hours of fucking he feels as though his dick wants to detach from his body and go to Mexico..
What's with guys asking if I wanna "kick it" like I'm some fucking 19 year old
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
Randomize
