i'd rather walk the sahara in a snuggie with no water than take a bicycle cab
Good, she had spurs on her boots. That is a sign for instant herp attack.
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
I think I'm getting too used to throwing up in the reception trash can. It doesn't even phase me anymore
This guy either needs to stop touching me or buy me another drink.
It was just a reflex. BOOM I kicked her in the face
We tried lying really still and being really quiet so that he wouldn't notice us before he left the room. Forgot about the glow in the dark condom.
I usually don't buy birthday presents for my booty calls
But you'll make an exception
probably not
We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night.
The next time you fuck up, your grandma sees your dick pics
DON'T YOU TELL ME I HAVE HERPES ON MY BIRTHDAY. THAT IS MOST DEFINITELY NOT A HAPPY BIRTHDAY.
Seeing your boyfriend, side piece, and great white buffalo, all in one night? Its a sign right?
Proceed with caution.
Let me rub your butt and eat French fries from your mouth and dip them in your ketchup filled belly button.
Would you paint my ceiling for oral sex?
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
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