I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
I don't want to have to wonder if I'm draining my pasta in the same side of the sink you pissed in
i was so blacked out at my family party.. my mom gave markers to all my little cousins. i was tagged by 5 year olds.
I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
He pulled the washer 5 feet out from the wall screaming about quarters
well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
Dude I'm about to just roll over and piss off the side of my bed, rather than make the conscious effort to get up and walk to the bathroom. One of those hangovers.
You are COMPLAINING that the sex was too good. You're not getting any sympathy from me
You can't mix blow jobs, bacon, and Star Wars.
A) just did. And b-z) that sounds like a great Sunday morning.
He thought he was ordering for the whole party so when he came back with thirty burritos and four of us were left, he wasn't happy
So, I'm about to take my pants off in the Walmart parking lot, when am old lady parks next to me. I'm all the way in the back next to the semis. What the hell?
my friend was passed out in the bathroom so I threw up in the coffee maker, not the pot the water reservoir that kind of drunk.
THEYRE FUCKING GOLD
Are you talking about the color of my tits or the quality of my nudes cause both are
He came and farted at the same time. My life is over.
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