if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
Just facebooked the guy whose name you're yelling in there. So you're aware, his interests include "swearing at babies" and "Ice luge"
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
On the bright side, I hit her with the door on the way in
im drunk. people are steering their children away from me. whatever it is that you called for, I assure you that I don't care. have a good night
You can't say "they have anal bleaching for that" and then just hang up
I really wanna just be like, can you just eat me out and stop whining
I think that would solve a million problems
of course we called 911. an innocent mans booze was at steak
i love how you just walk into that dealer's house every time without knocking, yet you don't even know his name
I sent you a snap of me in the bath, and you sent me a snap of a taco. An actual taco.
He has a baby picture of himself on the night stand. I don't think this whole 'one night stand' thing is for me.
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
i just turned on my printer and found 10 pounds of german chocolate inside. i think i found where you hid your candy last night
I often wonder if we’re introverted extroverts, but I don’t think so. I think we’re just easily tired scumbags
I gave Sophia a glitter bomb for Christmas. And before you ask is because she pooped in my cat litter box and then drank all my liquor and didn't pay me back and refuses to acknowledge that she had any wrongdoing. So she gets to clean up glitter for the next 10 years.
Randomize
