We're watching an ocean show on Discovery Channel and drinking every time they say "dolphins." PS. Seals kill birds. Tell all your friends.
literally followed a trail of condoms to the bus stop this morning. Ahh modern-day bread crumbs
His little brother walked in on us. Six times.
walking in back of a girl wearing booty shorts, a halter and a bracelet that says trainwreck. I don't get it. The first day of nice weather and all the whores come out, are they like hibernating bears or something?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've never seen a homeless man jog to get off the bus and then run to his panhandling spot because he's "late for work," but you see something new every day.
Drinking down Plan B with a 5 hour energy. Winding down welcome week in style.
Oh shit I just realized the ropes are still tied to the bedposts
If I win the contest of drinking the most water I get a chicken nugget.
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I literally walked into the toilet, looked at my reflection, said "alcohol" and went back to bed...
He was jealous of me and threatened by me. I'm like, just cause I could fuck your girlfriend doesn't mean I'm going to
She's not even my type. She doesn't have a penis or a drug problem
lesson learned. Never drop acid before a trip to the aquarium. Sounds awesome, is actually terrifying.
do me a favor, I need this weekend off so can you work your magic and blow my boss again?
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
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