How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
Down at cameli's and some homeless dude just pulled out a taser. Awesome.
I just opened up the mens room door to a dude pissing in the urinal and pointing at himself in the mirror
the cop cuffed us all with 40's still taped to our hands
Looks like a significant portion of my drinking money just became legal fees.
He's coming over for beer and a movie, but I just don't know if he's interested.
Pathetic and sad. I should come over there and fuck both of you just to get the ball rolling.
tell me there's a reason my bed smells like paint thinner
We got caught having sex in the bathroom by my professor. In accordance with tradition, we still brofisted. I think my grade went up considerably.
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
We had sex on his grandparents floor... the taxidermy deer was staring at me the whole time!
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
I just saw a cat, if i ate those mushrooms 15 minutes earlier i wouldn't have made it to the bar
Nothing like casual arson to brighten your day
Soo I'm in the trunk of a car drunk about to jump on trampolines. My life rocks!
Boys winking, cowboys tipping their hats, old people looking disappointed.... ah, I had forgotten the unholy powers of exposed cleavage!
You are my hero.
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