my mother and i just seriously had a convorsation about why you cant Google "Refurbished Dildos"
he was sending me dirty texts but i was watchin nickeloden and couldnt get into it
im ashamed your my cousin
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
Dude. He only had one testicle. It was like his whole package was a Muppet Show character coming at me.
just saw way to many penises for it being 5 o'clock on a thursday
He just said "fuck you" to the bowl he's eating things out of
In the middle of pouring my wine you asked me if I could hear your vibrator from my room.
Well, thats the first guy to go to jail because of my vagina
Post that event on your timeline
We are going to the humane society and getting you microchipped so you don't get lost on your birthday. Either that or your getting a child leash
I stood in my living room with two beers in my hand asking these said beers if they were going to drink each other. I then insisted that I would drink them and chugged both. Happy Halloween.
Also I feel like death. But like. In a good way
I'm a stupid stupid woman who is totally going to rock this holiday season dick drunk on that Ginger
I left him naked in his bed. I did cover his junk with a blanket in case his roommate walked in later though. so I don't feel as bad about it.
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
Randomize
