p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
You went to church with your boobs hanging out?
Theyr'e a gift from god, I figured I should show him i'm using them well.
he wont speak to me right now because i told him it must suck knowing he'll never be as good as edward cullen..idiot.
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
You know you're deprived when the only thing you taste while chewing gum is the 2 grams of sugar alcohol.
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
Can we do a version of last night where I actually remember shit?
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
We are buying drugs from a guy with a Jesus fish on his dodge caravan.
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
You've got until 8 and then I'm kicking down your door and pouring a beer down your ass via funnel
You were a cyclone of alcohol and bad decisions - like a gay Tazmanian devil
I mean I know I'll get over it by like tonight but ew ew eww. I cannot. Dude I don't even know his name also I threw up on his penis
To be clear you just said "I'll give you a baby" as a sext?
I woke up with a jacket; in it passport, hockey tickets, sunglasses, credit card, bank transactions
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