she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
don't worry, i already broke the ice when i told the story about how i super glued a picture of big bird to my vag.
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
I only had sex with her cause she looked like jwoww from jersey shore
Who faxed a picture of their penis to the office printer?!
Hm, finding a time when my drinking and your real life don't conflict could be difficult
I thought it was my alarm clock, turns out it was her vibrator still going off on the side of my face.
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
GDI YOU HAVE THE GOD OF FUCKING THUNDER'S NUDES AND YOU DIDN'T SHARE
The Olympian is in my bed
Its a good night when you get to makeout with a cowboy
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
You made the lady who made your cheeseburger sign the box so that when she got famous you would have her autograph.
Like Napoleon Dynamite?
Exactly like Napoleon Dynamite
But with bacon.
Randomize
