Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
there should be a national holiday dedicated to how high i am
Dude you can sell sperm for 100 to 250 bucks a time. And the best part is there will be kids all over the world that will have me as a daddy. It's like I'm jerking off my way into ruling the world
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's married, a coworker, and a smoker. not sure which personal rule broken i'm most ashamed of...
I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
I miss the time when Mondays weren't the new Thursdays. I can't drink like my 17 year old self anymore.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Will it make you feel better if we wear the title of dysfunctional fucking roommates? It requires monogamy unless we want to bang someone together.
I'm sorry, the person you're trying to reach is WAYYY too high to deal with this right now.
Was having the best sex dream I've had in a while and only woke up when I heard my grandma fall down the stairs.
i got pulled over completely sober but looking like death. dick cop made me do a field sobriety test. he also said "no sober person could have 7 BK bags"
I made out with a 40 year old and told her we were dating then got kicked out of a gay bar. This is the day I stop drinking.
I'm literally watching a webcam of the Vegas strip right now and it is making me sad.
Randomize