that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
he referred to my room as the tit cave...
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
Walking in to my alcoholic Assessment meeting with a black eye = 40% awkward 60% awesome
fat chick, vomit on the dog, and three unidentifiable pills in my ear. all in the same ear. what the hell happened after the guests showed up?
My reasons for going are selfish. She just opened her own law firm. I figure having a lawyer as a friend is a good idea. Nothing in my life suggests I won't need a lawyer again.
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
You're like the fucking Mozart of sexting.
I can't sleep. Send Llama pictures.
Do not take the D yet, he needs to be worth it. Your Vagina is GOLD.
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
There's lube and condom packets all over the street we missed something awesome.
They have a shelf full of jello shots, what have i gotten myself into
Randomize
