you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
WHY IS EVERY MAN IN THIS CITY GAY? IS IT SO BAD TO WANT TO BE TREATED LIKE A PIECE OF SHIT BY A REALLY HOT STRAIGHT MAN FOR A NIGHT?
broke the door off of my fridge tryin to have a indoor rodeo
Evidently I told a girl she should leave the bar because no one wanted to fuck her.
I still can't believe he turned down that threesome with us in central park. He must be really committed.
I love you more than champagne and correct grammar
Tell me about it I woke up on your couch with only my underwear on and a 26 year old wrapped around me. I thought my thirties would be different.
There really needs to be a redbox for wine because I want some but too lazy to walk into a store
If they were bad they leave that night, if they were good they get a gold star, and if they were great they get invited back. Simple.
so "excuse the stench" wasn't the correct thing to say when your boyfriend's parents walk in on you shitting. Live and learn
It was a great idea to buy that cocaine while dressed as an elf. It snowed all night for me.
I wore the clothes I got arrested in last night to work today.....there is no where but up from here!
what happened to you last night?
I dunno man, i pissed in a urinal, sent you a picture of my vagina and woke up with 25 bar stamps on my arms.. you tell me
I'm still here... I feel so bad wearing your mom's cardigan at a strip club 🙈
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