Worst sexual experience IN MY LIFE. And now i know why it makes jesus cry.
am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
You came back with puke all over your sweatshirt and started doing darth vader impressions
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He asked the clerk if they sell a penis-shaped brander.
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
Doing laundry, just found a knob off your stove in my pants pocket. I don't know.
I think the multiple Sunday morning sirens outside my window are a plot by the cops to get back at me for the shit we pulled last night. Or I should move to a better area.
The taxi driver was going on about how many drunk chicks want to sleep with him when he drives them home. Not sure if he was bragging or hinting
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That birthday blow job you ordered came in the mail today. I suggest you hurry home.
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
I am. I woke up on someone's front lawn dressed as max Payne also be proud.
I still can't believe a guy pooped in my backyard
Somehow my boobs came up in conversation AGAIN last night and I'm still not getting laid...
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
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