I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
Wine smoothie.... Not as good as I thought it would be
I woke up next to her this morning and couldn't remember her name. Luckily, she had written it on my hand so that I could add her on facebook.
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
If i ever start ordering tequila again please tackle me to the ground and steal my wallet
Is it weird that the cop that arrested me called me twice to tell me that I left my ring at the police station
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
About to throw up, bathroom line up, Bro sees me. Yells, 'PUKER GET OUT OF WAY' THEY ALL PARTED WAY THREW ME INTO A STALL AND CHEERED AS I THREW UP INTO THE TOILET. we are going back
The album on my phone containing gross pictures to send when boys ask for nudes is now substantially larger than my normal photo album. Because I send one every night
It's the 3rd day of the year and I've already sucked two dicks. New year same ole me.
A girl showed up in my tinder and I have it set to only men... I super liked her because I need a lesbian experience
i cant go to his party cause last time i pressed the red buttons on the wall and the fire alarm went off for 40 minutes, i'm not allowed back there
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