He gave his mom his old phone, and I am SO paranoid
Did you send adult things?
Um. Yes would be the understatement of the year
I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
i wanted a birthday blowjob. not a birthday VD.
I think call of duty has replaced my masturbating. And I'm alright with that.
I just dont understand why you didnt cut me off when I took the funnel into the bathroom and started peeing and funneling at the same time
bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
The great thing about skinny blondes is that they're all interchangeable.
He was dressed in a pink dressing gown feeding people ketamine from a plastic sword he called Excalibur. how was your Monday?
only thing in my fruit bowl is 4 champagne corks and a jenga piece . Tuesday.
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
i love it when bitches who pick on you in high school get fat. thank you facebook you have made my day.
My neighbor came out@4am in a pink nite gown n clotheslined a punk on a mo-ped w/her mop handle, then just walked back in her house like she just checked the mail. MILF 1 PUNK 0
Let me just get through this whole court subpoena thing and then ill go back to buying alcohol for minors.
Any chance he has an open marriage? That penis shouldn’t be wasted on one woman. It should be shared with all womankind, or at least me. I’m too good at sex to be deprived a penis that large
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