Cold hands, warm shart.
So I just saw a commercial for tickle me Elmo furry gloves. And I thought hmm I bet I could jerk off with those. Is that a sign of deepseated charachter issues?
dude my little brother busts into my room last night and yells did you know that grandma is hiding scrambled eggs between her legs
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch".
I think that the jello shots in bowls is where it all went wrong.
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
He probably tastes like german chocolate and coffee beans
Seriously though, my ovaries are trying to crawl out of my body and into his pants.
Pretty sure I just puked up sand. And nothing else.
Just blew a guy who had the same phone case as me. It was destiny.
like are we talking 'quick beer' bad or 'break out the real vodka' bad
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
Banged a guy with 2 broken arms once. Top that
I think she lost me at about the point where the words “Ice Cream Enema” were spoken.
Randomize
