So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
you didnt remember my name all night. you kept referring to me as "the blonde with the fat ass"
the only reason i even kissed her was because we were having sex when it midnight, and i heard people yelling "happy new year."
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
I'll just get wasted and start throwing myself at men. Someone's bound to take the bait
He blew a load on his roommates pillow just to piss him off. Why did you introduce me to these people?
I HOPE YOURE READY TO KICK SOME SERIOUS ASS AT TRIVIA NIGHT TOMORROW NIGHT. also, i hope the birth of your niece goes well. BUT MOSTLY TRIVIA NIGHT.
Sorry about flashing you in front of your mom.
Hey where the fuck is the rest of my beer? Lets start this day off right
I sat on my couch last night watching What Women Want, eating ice cream, and sobbing "why doesn't she like me?" Why was I born a man?
Just did body shot off a midget. Pretty good start.
I'll just bring the big suitcase this trip so I don't have to play wine bottle tetris again.
He's a cop. Do you know how many times I've said fuck the police? This is my chance. I'm taking it.
In other news, just had to pluck an ingrown pub with the pliers from my multi tool while sitting on the toilet at work.
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
Randomize
