I just sneezed everywhere.....everywhere. Now no one will talk to me.
I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
Dude..masurbate with cocoa butter lotion..its like cocoa pebbles just gave me a hand job
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
I guess I tried to show you how big my closet was and we ended up eating pickles in my bathroom
Was rudely woken up by strangers at 4:15am. I was leaning against the stoplight at 9th
He answered his phone while he was eating me out and proceeded to yell at his wife for interrupting lunch...impressed or rock bottom?
Very excited! Vodka will be shot, dicks will be ridden, and memories made.
I haven't been hungover in so long I'm actually looking forward to it
I vaguely remember a drunken mid sex pinky promise to not let it get weird.
a guy offered me a piece of pizza if I'd make out with a random girl. We got the whole damn box and I ain't even mad
driving home hungover today was like a life test..it was like the goblet of fire
We went to the midnight donut shop and you hopped the counter and told everyone to "Get the Fuck out of your Bar" but to also "Make yourselves at home".
Thanks for driving us home last night. Also, blanket apology for anything I may have said/done. I blacked out sometime near the t-shirt cape incident
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