Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
I thought you should know that there is a scientific law stating that when there is booze, people talk about your dick.
she chugged a bowl of salsa and then gave my ferret weight loss tips. she's like my fucking spirit animal now
I need moral support for this bender
I'm going on a valentine's date with the random guy i hooked up with in the bar bathroom this weekend...i feel like julia roberts
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
Using Michelob Ultra as champagne.
I would like you to know I am eating your apology chocolate, which means i forgive you for puking everywhere before formal
The bros used their bong water as pong water but I walked in mid game and didn't know so they hit our first cup and I chugged it.
She's in labor and I'm doing shots. Whose the real winner here?
Cocaine is ok on a cleanse, right?
I'm not winning any crowns in the Miss Emotionally Stable pageant either...
I would just like to say that I had morning sex today to the Hamilton soundtrack. So.
I would have wore underwear last night if I knew I had to change a tire this morning
Randomize
