just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
Just so you know, a true one night stands ends with a 7 minute blow job after eating a sandwich she made for you while the taxi you called for her comes
In an m&m suit playing manhunt drunk. And you thought you werent guna have a good time
She started howling at the moon. That was pretty much the deal breaker.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There is a positive side to a sinus infection. Exclusively cowgirl sex. I've convinced her I'd pass out if I had to do the work.
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
I mean, it's just pathetic when the standard is tinder and he can't live up to it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I didn't have time to wash my hair yesterday. Ended up spraying some Febreeze on it.
I think I must have activated my bat signal.... All three of my FWBs contacted me today!
Leaving the puke on the ceiling as a reminder.
If ur gunna go fuck a guy that's in the baseball hall of fame do you need to shave your legs? I'm so lazy
Having sex with him is like yoga. I do it in the morning and then can't walk for three days afterwards.
I just got fed by 3 guys. I love my job.
Randomize