You're a big dope. Life is about fighting for what you want, not accepting what you hate.
Why does tequilla always make you text me?
You can now add 30,000 feet to the places where I have puked
I just woke up at my desk with "To Whommmmmmmmm" typed on a letter. I have no memory of waking up, getting dressed or driving in.
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
I gave him my yeast infection. HOW THE FUCK DOES THAT EVEN WORK?
i have a queen bed, a cherrywood bed frame, and gold sheets. how are you saying no to me right now?
I brought a guy home then decided no. Took him back to the bar and said "I'm going to drop you where I found you. Have fun"
She said I'm so hungry I could eat a dick and winked at me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
Happy Thanksgiving! Hope its not too awkward that your dad and your boyfriend are the same age.
You were throwing cups at people in the basement, yelling at them to get out of your swamp.
this new dose of ADD meds is totally being waisted with the unemployed new graduate thing if only I could add my hyper focused side effects to a coverletter
I can insert a female catheter, but I cannot grill a cheese.
Also, you think turning 23 is bad, I just ran into the guy that gave my chlymidia
Randomize