Uhh me and Jacque peed on the street outside the bar last night and wiped with flowers. I vaguely remember her repeating the word "fresh" over and over.
I consider it a successful poop when you only have to wipe once.
official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
We left his house because I forgot how to drink water, I was just holding it in my mouth and then spitting it out, needless to say I don't remember the sex.
Oh and yeah that does count as public urination.
I just set an alarm for 5 am tomorrow morning titled "Wake and Bake Its Christmas motherfucker"
I don't even have his number. I have his pants tho
so I think we need to change lawn care services...the guy woke me up by the pool while I was naked...told me he already picked up all the beer cans for us and gave me his number for the next time we party...
You had sex with a Scottish dude with a peg leg....how could I NOT tell that story??
I woke up in my basement holding someone else's underwear and a bottle of mouthwash . I wish I could explain more than that but i can't remember ...
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
Randomize
