My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
I mean, I gave him a hand job on the Pearl Harbor tour bus; I don't know what the fuck else he wants out of this "relationship"
We fucked in my trunk while on the clock....what did you do at work today?
How bad is it that I'm banned from all of your family functions due to sleeping w/ both your brother and sister and they both hate me for pursing a relationship with either of them.
You know in a few years she's gonna look like her mom. So if you're gonna hit that you better do it while she still looks like somebody else.
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
I Pavlov-trained him by smacking him in the nuts anytime I caught him looking at another girl in public. To this day, he's afraid to break eye contact with me in a restaurant if a tall busty blonde walks in.
Dude if i sent you a picture of the inside of my fridge would you be able to break down and explain everything that was in it?
See! Theres potential!
Oh yeah. All good relationships start with a threesome.
I'll admit it. It was a bad idea to sneak a fart out while she was taking a nap. Can you bring me a pair of underwear from my dresser. Preferably the one with the walruses in party hats one.
i wasnt sure i had a crush on her until i woke up this morning and saw i had googled fifteen variations of "lesbian marriage in estonia". where the fuck is estonia
Get ready tonight we are going to get drunk and pierce my nipples
When are you getting back?
Well google maps doesn't have an estimated time for crawling... Could be days
My son's girlfriend just thanked me for having good penis genes.
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