You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
Just saw a baby with a T-shirt that read "I am the result of my mother forgetting to take her magic pills". I can't believe they make shit like that.
just walked past a girl in her cap and gown puking her brains out beside a tree. her friends were taking pictures of her.
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
So both cops helped talk her into coming back into the bar and doing a shot with me. The main argument being, "a bar is no place to be sober!"
Im in my back seat in my own drive way with two beers left to shotgun and watching the sunrise. Am I over her yet?
after attempting to eat a candy cane bigger than my hand i have determined there's no way to eat this that doesn't seem erotic
A warmed up burrito and jelly beans. The breakfast of champions.
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
he's smothering me... and not in the good, can you move your thigh off my face please?.. way
Just looked at the TV in the bar for the weather report. Didn't want to walk home drunk during a tornado warning
Randomize
