is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
And I'm PMSing. So if I'm not crying, I'm masturbating.
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
I was really excited when he said that condoms didn't fit him, then he added "they fall right off"...
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying.
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
you know, i'm always afraid you're going to think i only want you for sex because i only text you when i'm horny
speaking of, guess what i'm thinking about
You gave me a bottle of tequila and introduced me to a ginger named cowboy. I actually love you.
You told me you were trying to learn all the MLB ballparks while you waited for your porn to load.
Let's take a shot for every time we've said "I don't want to get that drunk tonight"
He kept spinning my wedding ring like thanks buddy I remember
I got really worried when i woke up and there weren't any missed booty calls from him between 3 and 5 am. Apparently his gf is in town ...
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
Randomize
