I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
I feel like I bought a front row ticket to watch her screw up her life
I feel if a girl leaves my house the next morning feeling degraded and in desparate need of a shower, then I have succeeded.
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
Everyone in the office is in total denial. I asked my boss what he did this weekend and he said "nothing much." But I know we were both thinking about the orgy.
Maybe it was silver. I don't know. I was drunk sifting through my dogs vomit.
fat people need to stop using the handicapped bathroom stall so I can have sex in it. it's common logic
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
One day soon I'll learn the difference between a good high and way too high. Today is not the day.
Currently having to re-watch episodes of Lost that I've only partially seen because you distracted me with your vagina
I gave my girlfriend a ring to celebrate our anniversary, she thought It was an engagement ring. Now im getting married and I don't know what to do.
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
Randomize
