I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
you said you were a responsible adult. then you licked the wall.
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
Did you really lure me out of the bar with a blond holding a dunkin donuts bag? Well played sir, well played.
After a little too much, I decided public urination was a constitutional right.. Nearly got deported for that one
Hey, you can't rush the perfect creeper shot. I need buffer time to hone my skills.
WE SHOULD MAKE A WORKOUT ROUTINE CALLED BARCARDIO
Did you drink ALL that 151??
No. We drank all the jaeger... Then used the 151 to start the fire. We're also out of paper towels... And your hairspray is flammable.
....she made me stop for like 3 minutes so she could talk to her cat....
The party was Hollywood themed and I won an oscar for "finest ass in a leading role"
he brings me coffee and gets a blow job. not sure if I trained him or he trained me or it's simply mutually beneficial beautiful.
YOUR STATE IS STUPID
Did you miss a turn again?
WHAT FUCKING IDIOT DECIDED TO DESIGN AN ENTIRE FUCKING STATE WHERE YOU CAN'T MAKE A FUCKING LEFT TURN?!? FUCK NEW JERSEY
I don't know what she did to me last night, but the scratches on my back indicate that I had sex with a Bengal tiger last night.
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
The only words I could make out were "Dicksmash McIroncock".
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