Let's just say he looked at my vagina like it was a rubics cube.
We each get one free throw up cleaning, no questions asked.
I mean I knew we were putting on quite a show but I didnt realize HOW good until I woke up and 4 people were passed out with their ears to the bedroom door.
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
Just found a 7-11 receipt for new years eve at 1:30 am apparently we felt the need to buy three jars of pickles and a gallon of milk does this ring any bells?
I'm drinking red wine & feeding anchovies to the dog. I'm really not picky about what kinda of company I'm in.
Jesus christ how hard is BRING SNACKS AND DRUGS to interpret? I trust your judgement on this one.
trying to figure out why the only thing in our freezer is an expired loaf of bread, a white t shirt, and a receipt from taco bell for 37.50 from last Friday
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
"This is Emily. She likes potatoes. And sometimes laughs and cries at the same time, and has a wonderful butt"
Should I be concerned that the new guy I'm seeing just referred to my stealing a sailboat in college while drunk as "wholesome"?
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
after stripping the bed and soaking it with the "pet spot remover" I have, I decided in the best interest of my mattress and our drunk friends bladders, i should invest in rubber sheets.
He asked if I was alright. I said "Yeah, I'm just an incapacitated ball of orgasmic bliss right now."
I might be a bit late, couldn't find my pants and had to go to the police station. Unrelated
Randomize
