I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
There's trophy wives that arent even in the 5th grade yet
he drank a monster margarita at dinner. had to ask me if it was dollars or minutes that ended in 60.
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
I fucked a 6'7 Danish man. In the ocean. At 5am. Greetings from Florida!
Finally better. I had to use eye makeup remover to get the purple wine stains off my lips
U should feel bad.. u r like a sex politician. All talk and no follow thru
This is a rough morning for me
No, rough is puking in your froyo cup next to a five year old and her grandma.
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
Sushi was just eaten off my naked body. I feel like I can die in peace now.
I need to have sex. It's becoming like a matter of public safety.
I just started the bonfire using a tampon. Who knew they could have multiple uses?
I wish I had a clear image of the dude who was sucking on my tit outside the bar last night
Your "whiskey dick" is glorious but also terrifying
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
Randomize
