I do no wrong. I am always right. Right? I forget why I am sending this. It seemed relevant.
Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
This time, try to not get fingered in the middle of the living room.
I DIDNT GET FINGERED
I was rubbed
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
He put crushed up bacon in the joint and now we're listening to the Matilda soundtrack I have no idea what's going on
I get hit on by the prison guards every time i go to see him. Seriously.
I just realized I'm currently not eating carbs, drinking alcohol or having sex. 2014 is off to a horrible start.
My mom and sister were over. When my drunk roommate came home, he yelled "GOT BITCHES IN MY CONDO"
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
First contact since we had sex and it's to get my HBO password. I sure pick winners huh
I had to try on three different bathing suits to hide my boob hickies
I'm tired, but I'm gonna go with "I watched the debate last night and part of my soul died"
Oh god he’s a clown I fucked a rodeo clown
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
Randomize
