were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
Wow, haven't had to deal with the 'stoned at the dinner table' scenario in a while
I know it's pride week, but your asshole is just never supposed to taste like banana.
I miss the days of selfishly blowing a load in the condom without her knowing and acting all like "we shouldn't do this" so she would get dressed and leave.
I just bought 7 working mopeds off a guy for $300. We are 60% of the way to our gay biker gang dream.
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
I found an inside smoking lounge. I'll be here for the next 4 hours. A nice old Canadian lady has befriended me and let me use her lighter. Fuck Hartsfield-Jackson AND this layover. I win.
Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice
dying me prepared for dead me... i woke up with my laptop open to the last snl episode, a bottle of gatorade, advil and a bag of chocolate all next to me
WHAT IF I SAT OUTSIDE AND STARTED SCREAMING THE LYRICS TO O CANADA WOULD THAT FIX IT
PLEASE DON'T
I don't need inspirational quotes. If I'm going to be motivated, it will be by anger and spite.
i just drunk stumbled into my home... to figure out that we moved 2 weeks ago..
drinking vodka out of a wine glass to feel a little bit classier about myself.
Randomize
