Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
she wrote "SORRY" in her vomit and left
Mustard is by no means a replacement for yellow wall paint
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
She was lying on the table chugging back something when the table broke
She kept going
My cousin is passed out in my room, so I just masturbated in my walk-in closet. Apparently I get off on danger. Make note of that.
My legacy here is being that tiny blonde girl that threw someone down and shouted "Fuck your face, I'm Dee Dee Ramone."
Well I just saw a fully naked man doing a headstand in a cooler of ice water.
I think vodka/water/skittles totally beats your crystal light mimosas
I'm sexting at my family's 4th of July BBQ and I feel no shame....
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
He bent me in ways I couldn't imagine.. and im a gymnast.
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