she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
No, that was before the police came, but after the hooker.
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
He was taking the caps off the vodka bottles and throwing them out the window so we'd have to finish them. Engineers have the best logic.
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I miss waking up knowing you're passed out under my bed.
I'm mortified. After he finished, he turned to me and said,"So, what did you think of my mom?" WTF Please tell me he was not wondering about that while he was going down on me!!!
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
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On the upside, no one went to the hospital! Lex's friend was definitely on fire at one point last night though because he tried to juggle tiki torches. He was shirtless this morning and smelled like a BBQ.
are you fucking roseanne barr in there?
My vagina cried when he left. I think she's about to be at war with my self respect.
I've finally become one of those chicks with a taco in her purse.
I'm so hungry and so lazy that I'm seriously considering ripping into that packet of cream cheese in my nightstand.
Just bought shot glasses from the thrift store. I think the guy buying a winter coat was even judging me.
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