like if someone fucked a dictionary but instead of having a penis, it was just one of those leap frog educational toys
I hope to god you are high
shes in my pool wearing only floaties on her arms ill have to raincheck watching march madness with you guys sorry
Just found a peacock feather in my car. Should I be the least bit concerned about this?
I find out next week of the Australian was lying about his vasectomy or not. Keep your fingers crossed!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just want to go to their admissions office and show them the video of him taking the flaming shot, and be like yeah...you let in the kid who lit his entire face on fire over me.
if you just come over, i will entertain you
arguing about the color of your bong does not count as entertainment
So dude comes out in a full body leotard and a wand and announced he's king of the gays. Chicago is a weird but fun place
I need to stop acting like a drunk bitch. People are going to get the right idea about me...
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have poison ivy and a broken finger. Don't have a threesome in the woods.
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
The man at the checkout said "Somebody's not fucking around".
It's gonna be a good night
when I walked in the door they were passed out naked, on top of eachother, with tetris controllers in their hands.
All she said was "Do me by Friday."
Randomize