Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
upper decked the toilet at the restaurant that wouldn't let me pee there yesterday
I picked her up for our first date on a fucking horse. Of course I got a BJ.
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh god the guy I took underwear from at the bar is trying to add me as a friend on facebook now.
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
My Valentine's Day plans just drastically changed... My F buddy just ran into my gf...in my driveway.
oh wow I have been there. Hell one time Matt and I woke up naked with pizza rolls in the bed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I may or may not vaguely recall punching you in the dick but it was a misunderstanding and I forgive you can we have make up sex?
The only things in my fridge are almond milk, Smirnoff Ice and chicken noodle soup. I'd say I've done mama proud.
You walked up to a random girl on the street and asked her for a bite of her pizza...
I really regret not asking “like a cupcake” when you asked me to eat your ass
I mean that was the nicest way to be dumped by some one I wasn't dating.
Apparently when you start crushing adderall and blending them into your margaritas calling them blenderalls you have "a problem" WTF
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