how was that guy you hooked up with?
i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing
Oh my god. Just had sex with this girl on the boardroom table at my work at midnight (win!) just realized I left the condom wrapper on the table (lose!)
some guy just walked by in the street and for 5 seconds yelled "IMM SOOOO HORNYYYYYY!!!!"
update: last drink of the night and im naked in my porch hammock. life is good.
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
I made him a flow chart of what to do if I got arrested.
Ran into his mom at the bar, i told her "i know he's married now but I'd still do him"
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
In my defense, I haven't stolen anyone's clothes yet.
Yeah, that's a plus.
Neither a grow-er nor a show-er. More like a no-er. If he didn't have testicles, I'm not sure you could tell he was a male, even standing there naked. There will be no second date.
If you can't seal the deal with her, I will. And you know I'll be successful. So there's your incentive
Regardless of how one feels after a break up, whiskey must be consumed.
MY GOD WHY DIDN'T I TAKE PHOTOS OF HIS CREDIT CARDS WHILE HE WAS SLEEPING
"They let me see the x-ray. My nose is broken. I saw it. It was cool. Well, I guess it would be cooler if it wasn't my nose."
Yes ma'am. I'm attracted to unconventional people, you know that.
True. I can't judge, half of my sexual partners I only know a false first name & a number. We all have our kinks.
Randomize
