real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
Slut skills are useful in every country.
she was carrying the quesadilla around the bar like a security blanket
He was sweet. He even warned me that his dick curved, and I quote, "more than a banana."
i've learned that i'm good at stealing things. like live cats.
I just had to beg some random guy to help me climb through your porch window since the door was locked. FYI...i hear you having sex in there. You could of at least taken a break to unlock the damn door. WTF!!!
You could woo kevin with a boquet of breakfast burritos. He loves those burritos. You could use the hot sauce packets like babies breathe
AMERICA LOVES YOU. RIDE THAT DICK LIKE PAUL REVERE RODE HIS HORSE SO MANY YEARS AGO
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
I spanked her so hard I woke up Grandma
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
I wonder how drunk we can get before Christmas Caroling turns into trespassing.
Woke up in a house I don't know, with someone else's pants on, and wolverine hair, to my girlfriend yelling on the phone about the 4 girls I made out with last
i just really want to fuck a guy wearing lederhosen
it'll be sexier than it sounds, i promise
Randomize
