she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
can you come get me at the bar
ill be there in 10 min
can we stop off at build a bear on the way home
i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
I woke up with flowers, a tiara & pasta salad in my bed. Tequila makes me act like a fat Disney princess
We can't be fuck buddies. You stare into my eyes while we fuck.
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
He asked me if I wanted to blow his whistle and proceeded to pull out an actual whistle.
No one should ever be so high that they forget the food. That's just...its a violation of God and Nature, of the very laws that we live by!
did you just send me my own nude
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
You literally just told me you're ditching me because of pizza. PIZZA? Wow.
I came home and my mom goes "why are you barefoot and where the hell are your shoes?" and I replied "I have French fries"
I woke up in the middle of the night with my dick out and my electric blanket on high. It's like she wanted a hot dog.
You pee in parking lots....i drive home naked.....thats the american dream i was promised
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
Randomize