respond to me or i'm telling everyone that you inserted a vodka soaked tampon into your anus
The only comparison I have for the iPhone is that it's like youre constantly getting a blow job
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
Sometimes I wonder why.. Then I realize I can't fool myself with that question bc we all know it's bc of his enormous dick
you know it takes a lot for me to use utensils conservatively
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
"Grocery shopping" is really just a euphemism for spending $20 on enough frozen food to last 2 weeks and spending the rest of your viable paycheck on alcohol.
Please make sure you have solid number of friends around you that wouldn't be afraid to break a bottle and stab someone. If you're planning on drinking all of that, you're going to need a safety net.
I'LL COME GET YOU. GOTTA FIND A SUIT THAT COVERS TIT BRUISES FIRST.
I didn't know what to say so I just sent him a chicken emoji
That's what you get for doing kinky shit with a guy that lives in his moms basement.
I think it's safe to assume that dad heard you lose your lesbian virginity last night
there was a goddamn geisha at house. my dick feels more cultured.
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
Randomize
