we were having sex in the shower and he dropped me. try explaining THAT to your concerned little brother
the only reason i invite her is so when the guys start to hit on her i know it's time to take their keys
I'm hoping you can explain why I woke up with what I believe is pumpkin pie all over my body
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
Just threw up in the waiting room. I can't believe I have to switch dermatologists again.
WHY DO I WANT TO FUCK EVERY GUY THAT BREATHES
I paid your brother in tostitos to drive me home.
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But that background check said 51...Omg. If I hooked up with someone that's my dads age.....
I was looking up travel destinations and somehow I ended up reading Paul's first letter to the Corinthians. I need to start going to church high...
Oh my god I would go to planned parenthood the same day I get my nipples pierced
I never saw such an emotional argument over yellow vs. spicy mustard.
he offered me cocaine within 5 minutes of my arrival. yes of course i'm keeping him
I have "if found please return to" written in sharpie on my arm, my uterus is rejecting everything, and I have hickies. I must actually be an 18 year old piece of shit girl instead of a responsible 23 year old
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